Just Say Yes
I know my friends are tired of me preaching about how you should never turn down a reasonable date, even if you may just want to be friends. A date is a date and its good practice. One girlfriend of mine emailed me saying I was going to say no, because I had a lot going on that weekend and then I thought ‘what would Tara do?’ So yeah, she went on the date and supposedly had fun, so there you go. Even if it doesn’t lead to something erstwhile, my philosophy is that it gets you that more comfortable dating and out there. I’m not saying to date a real jerk just because they asked you out, I mean accepting dates within reason and if you're not interested after that you don't have to go on a second.

The following Newsweek article Dating: Positive Thinking about the book, The Year of Yes, just goes to show that my advice might be sound after all...

Maria Dahvana Headley grew up listening to the "Just Say No" anti-drug campaign of the 1980s. As a student at NYU in the late '90s, she applied that advice to her love life, turning down most men who asked her out and dating only intellectual, literary types. Frustrated by those guys, she reversed course, resolving to spend one year responding positively to all flirting and saying yes to literally anyone who asked her out. The ensuing 150 dates included a homeless man, several non-English speakers, 10 taxi drivers, two lesbians and a mime.

Headley's memoir of the experience, The Year of Yes, is now in bookstores, and Hollywood's already calling. She urges other people to say yes more often, despite some horrible dates. (One guy took her to a bar that, it became clear, was a strip club—and that's a tame example.) "Lots of women are pretty set in what they think they have to have in order to be happy, but it doesn't hurt to date people who are not that," she says. It worked for her: during her dating spree, she met a playwright who was divorced and 25 years older and had two children—baggage that would have ordinarily nixed his chances. They married in 2003; now 28, Headley lives in Seattle with two teenage stepchildren. "It's something I never would have picked, but it's turned out to be this kind of amazing experience," she says.

Posted by Tara at 7:40 AM PST

Updated: Monday, March 20, 2006 8:57 AM PST

Share This Post

Post Comment | View Comments (1) | Permalink

Valentine's--not just for Lovers
I've never spent Valentine's Day with a special someone, since I've always happened to be single around VDay. Yet, I'm not one of those that scorn the Hallmark inspired event. My girlfriends find it annoying, one commented the other day, "it seems like a Tara holiday." I guess she's right. I just love holidays in general, Halloween though being my favorite. But just because you're single does not mean you can't enjoy Valentine's Day, it's like St. Patrick's Day, you don't really have to be Irish to participate.

I guess for me it's always been a friendship holiday actually. It started when we all would give our classmates Valentine's cards in elementary school, delivering them to each others desks. I still give out those little kids cardboard like cards to my friends each year and wear red to work. Yeah, I'm that annoying person.

Tonight I'm heading to Westchester to spend the evening with my mother and Nanny (who has been missing us). Aww, I know, although it's not last year's Valentine's day with Tony Danza. My favorite Valentine's Day though was in the 2nd grade when my father ordered me a HUGE heart shaped box of chocolates and I mean huge, it was literally bigger than me, I could barely hold it with my arms stretched out wide. My mother made me bring the chocolates to school in order to get them out of our house. There was enough chocolate for both 2nd grade classes and then to be brought into the teacher's lounge afterwards. Even by the time I was in the 4th grade, when I met my new teacher she said, you're the girl whose dad got her the big chocolate heart that we had here for days. Last year my stepdad had a VT teddy delivered to my office, so for me Valentine's isn't about romance but just love and friendship in general.

News: Valentine's go high-tech with text messaging.

The party before the storm
So I'm snowed in, over a foot of snow and still coming down. This storm ranked as the biggest snow storm in New York City history with 26.9 inches recorded in Central Park. Yet, my local Chinese restaurant is still making deliverers. I'm in my pjs watching TV, had to cancel brunch plans. Here's the view this morning from my fire escape:


On Friday night at midnight my friend Cindy got a bunch of us into the club Suede VIP--free drinks and entrance. Her friend dates the owner or something and after three years the place is going to be turned into a gay bar very soon, so we finally coordinated our schedules and got our groove on there. Although some of the guys were pretty sketch and they kept touching our hair when dancing, it was weird. Anyway as promised, here are some photos at the club and after wards, Massiel and I around 4 a.m., tired and waiting for our fries at Florent.



News: Frequent Netflix renters sent to back of the line Grr!

Quote of the week: Karen: "It's not like it's Ben and Jerry Go to White Castle." Me: "What? You mean Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle!" Karen: "Why what did I say?"

Been there
Who's had a date that has ended like this? ;)



I was unsuccessfully holding in laughter when I spotted this expressive photo on the subway last night. The man over me whose NY Times I was spying on looked at me as if I was cracked though.

To read the story that the photo actually belongs to go to:
Undercover Agent in Fur Snares a Fake Veterinarian.

What's on my DVR
Dancing With The Stars
Project Runway
Lost
Grey's Anatomy
Desperate Housewives
My Name Is Earl
Monk
Commander In Chief
Daisy Does America
Alias
Joey
Hope & Faith
What I Like About You
Living With Fran
How I Met Your Mother

Sexy Fashion Stat: The average American spends between $60 and $360 a year on lingerie (RedBook). I wonder how much is spent on Valentine's day alone, by their men too.


Today's Random Search Query: I often receive hits in from search engines due to some random search queries. Today someone reached my blog by typing in, "how to met girls in ny city for free." First of all, using bad grammar like that will make it that much harder to meet someone, never mind for free. Secondly, I have no idea why When Tara Met Blog came up, yes, I am a girl in NYC, but I am anything but free ;)

Personal Quote of the Week: Who wants to go to a Republican party anyway? How much fun could it be without any gays?

Link My boss Leo just wrote a blog post on Avoiding the Wussification of Public Relations . I had suggested he use the word 'acquiescent,' which he did! It's pretty kick ass, the blog post that is, not the word.